The mouse cursor which now had transformed into the shape of the letter I and the ceaseless blinking of the cursor reminded him to write something down. He still has no idea, no drafts or no motivations at all. All he did was he synced his blinks with that of the mouse cursor leaning his back on that flexible black leather chair with his hands behind his head, a fully laid back situation. His white coffee mug, which yells ‘Yes!! You Can’ was imprinted in Bold Black Letter is on the table facing the main window that faces the main street. The street has lined up shops from clothes to butcher and a big old wooden pole at the side of the street with lots of wires draped, dangling and branching out of. The pole was the only thing that gives the street the urban vibes. There is a tea-shop with old zinc roof sitting right next to pole and complementing each other and their company to each other is ancient. The tea shop, most of the time stays crowded with people. In the distance there was a big open ground with little green patches. He has never been there and has hardly seen anything happening. He likes that place though it seems left out from the modernization, he likes it because he can witness two different sides of a city; crowded in the day and empty at night.
All he wants to do today is create something beautiful, now after all the worthless staring at the screen all he wants is to write at least something satisfying. But the mind was void and barren, unable to grow something in or drag something out. 5 mins turned into 10 and 10 turned into 30. Still nothing, not even a word and the yes you can statement on his mug seems as if it was mocking him. He looks out from the window at the street. It is raining outside. He was so lost into the monitor that he didn’t even realize that it is raining outside. Now, he wants a cup of coffee but he has been sitting there for so long that he is too lazy to get up and make one for himself.
He just sits placing his hands on his chin and keeps looking outside as far as he can see. It is drizzling outside and the visibility is poor, he tries to see as far as his sight can make. He looks at the sky, black and gloomy as if something is just not there, something incomplete, something missing. The street which is usually busy at this hour looks different today, May it’s the rain he thought. He looks at his table clock, 4:15 pm. He has been there idle for almost 4 hours, the 4 unproductive hours as he would say. He takes a long fresh air mixed with the smell of rain.
He gets distracted when the battery low notification pops at the lower right hand corner of the screen. He rises from his seat to plug in power adapter and tries reaching for the power cable at the back of the table, he sees two little girls in their school uniform crossing the tea shop on their way. The girls are sharing an umbrella. They look wet and looking from the socks and shoes it seems they came trotting on puddles on the way. They have smiles on their faces and are happy. Following those girls comes a woman with a black umbrella in one hand and lifting her sari trying to avoiding the puddles on the road with the other. Seeing how fragile her walk is, she seems old and weak too. He tries to get a glimpse of her face but the umbrella was completely blocking what he wants to see.
While he was admiring the red color of her Sari, she is out of his sight. Then, he sees an old man standing outside of the tea shop unlike others who are inside the shop, chatting and taking sips of tea in that weather. The tea!! Hmm.. Tea is best during rainy days he thought but still he didn’t bother to get up and make himself a cup of tea. The old man whatsoever was just standing, neither talking to anyone nor having tea like others. He was just looking at as the sky as though he wants the rain to stop so he can move on. He doesn’t look happy with the rain.
Now, he looks away far, where he could see some school boys in their school uniform playing football in that ground, which now looks like a field ready for plantation. Just like the little girls earlier they look happy too and carefree as they don’t seem bother with all the dirt and the mud that can get into their clothes he thought. How happy they are he thought. The rain doesn’t seem to stopping soon he thought and finally decides to make something to drink. But just when tries to haul his eyes into his room, he sees two dogs one black and one brown with shady white patches which looks bigger too cuddling for warm just next to that old man.
That was it, now, he couldn’t help but starts thinking about his own brother who was always there when he needed. His parents who are now old and weak but still toiling to earn a living in country, his friends with whom he had spent some best time of his life and his little sister with whom he has been feeling disconnected lately. Ohh! How he wishes if everything could only be according to his will. Just for a day, if only he could do whatever he wants just for day. Then he would do everything to live as those days.
He sees himself playing football on the field with his friends. Shouting, screaming at each other, soaked up and completely smeared inside-out in mud, he sees his friends and laughs when they slip on the mud and fall on the ground. So much fun!!
Playing and not knowing the time was the best, not to worry about anyone and not to care about anything because there is always someone who will care about you and worry about you. Almost dusk and his little sister comes to deliver the message from mother. Mother is looking for you, come home! Ahh, how easy it was and how royal it feels to have your own messenger. Tell her I am coming in 15 minutes. He never kept his promise of returning on time because he has his brother to protect him if anything goes wrong, if there comes the time to have some scolding and punishment. He can always count on his brother to back him and cover him. Not everyone is blessed with brother like mine. He signed!!
Getting late home, dirty, wet and hungry was not something regular but the love of mother was constant and unending. Before saying anything else, mother who usually adorns her in red sari and waits for us sitting by the fire says you guys must be hungry, get changed and come to eat. Life was so easy with mom. The warmth of her love had won over all the cold and has been the motivation to live another day like today. Just like today, playing, friends, fun, easy meal and mother’s love.
Father has always been busy, He works in the field all day long and as soon as he sees us in the house, he says did you read? Why does he always cares about reading so much? Why can’t he be like mother? So strict! He is always serious and forces us to study, don’t know what’s his problem is. He doesn’t know how hard it is to study. Always, always read, read, read. Just, because we are afraid of the father figure, we would sit near the fire with our book open and loud read the words from the pages. We would wait for the dinner and go to sleep. We always see father very busy, tired and not jolly.
Only two blankets and only two beds for five lives in the house but still it is enough for all of us. Sleeping with brother is fun, he tells story sometimes, horror. Scary but fun! And sister usually sleeps with mother and father as she is still very small and we I am all grown up so I sleep with my brother. The cold night in the small house feels not so bothering and wait for another day seems easy.
“Get lost!!” you filthy dogs!!
That scream of the tea-shop owner not only scare the two dogs away but also ushers him from his home to reality.
Suddenly he comes back to his senses, his real world far from his village. He is not with his brother. The kids playing in mud are not his friends, the old man waiting for the rain to stop isn’t his father and the woman in red sari isn’t his mother. He was drifted off into his memories from reality for a moment. But now he is back in his room, alone and sad. The room which he liked all of a sudden feels cold and vile. The room was always like that, nothing changed. The only difference is that the blinking of the mouse curser had lost into the black curtains of the monitor just like his memories are lost in the reality.
Finally, he gets up and heads towards kitchen to make himself a tea.
**note: I do not own the photo by any means.